Weary

In his last post, Steve promised an update after we talked to the doctor. There was a delay in the doctor's call to me as he was trying to line up the timing and transport for some sensitive labs that need to be run. First, I want to thank you so much for continuing to check in on us, praying for us, and leaving such wonderful and encouraging messages. I want you to know that we read each and every one of them and appreciate them so much. CarePages does not have a way to respond back to messages but we wanted you to know that we do receive and read every one of them and they truly do bless us more than you could probably ever imagine. Thank you from the depths of my heart for loving us so well!

So, to the doctor's phone call -- This will be a short summary because I must admit, much was discussed but the "could be" options are weighty. It seems some issues I thought were completely ruled out are now back in the picture, including lymphoma among other things. At this point there is nothing accomplished by sitting in fear or anxiety for "what might be" so I am choosing to spare you and me in this update. The current plan is the commencement of new labs and tests; several with a lengthy waiting period of at least 3-4 weeks for results. But hey, we are getting much better at this waiting thing each time we get to grow in the discipline some more! The efforts to allow my body to fight the CMV virus without competition from outside infections continues so the limiting of my exposure to the outside world continues indefinitely at this point.

I have had an especially rough couple of weeks physically as symptoms, new and old, seem to be advancing. When we started this page I promised to always be honest with how I was doing, so I am admitting the last days have been extremely hard. I know this journey called life is a marathon but this runner is very tired and extremely weary. My thoughts and prayers are contained in hundreds of lines that have been written in my journal but I think I will close with a new entry I just

wrote in my journal.

"Be Still ... "

Jesus saw I was sick and getting tired

Resting on my own was not to be

So He put His own plan in place

And whispered, "Come be still with me."

Within the walls of my peaceful home, I was ordered to be tucked away.

The busyness of life and ministry

Was not going to be in its usual way.

With my tearful eyes and questions of "why" Jesus asked me to trust in Him.

He is still in control and this is His plan.

He does all for our good and it's never a whim.

My time at home in solitude continues on

I am learning a lot about this plan called "rest". The renewing of my weary body, heart, and soul Reminds me

that Jesus, as always, knows best.

Now my prayer is not to waste these hours By selfishly wishing them away

But rather seek the face of Jesus

To find the joy in each new day.

In sickness, infirmity, and isolation His Kingdom work can still be done.

Now my unceasing, humble prayer to Him is "Jesus, what do you want me to become?"

- Lee Brooks, March 2011

Please pray for us. Thanks for checking in on us. We love you. Lee (and Steve)

---

Messages

Di Cieslak

March 29, 2011, 10:48 PM

Your poem is beautiful, Lee. And so tender and encouraging. You remain in my prayers, and I love you so much! -di

Sandi Henry

March 29, 2011, 10:54 PM

Lee and Steve, I feel so sad that you don't have any answers yet and that lymphoma is back in the picture. Your poem is beautiful. It's another example of how God is using you. Thank you for reminding me to find the joy in each day. Thank you for

sharing your heart. You are in my thoughts and prayers every day. We love you, but God loves you even more. sandi

Linda Surber

March 29, 2011, 11:21 PM

Lee, I'm praying for you and Steve. And I'm thankful to you for the example you are to me of how to live a life truly trusting in Jesus; of how to be content in His will: Psalm 131:1-2.

Steven Mulkey

March 29, 2011, 11:24 PM

The Mulkey family will be praying.

Debby Swecker

March 29, 2011, 11:28 PM

Lee, I wish I could steal you away for a day in the country. I would wait on you and treat you like a queen..... We are continuing to pray for you and Steve because we love you both so much!

Mary Ellen Costa

March 29, 2011, 11:57 PM

Lee: Your journal entry is beautiful! I'm so sorry you are going through so much. I, too, have learned to be honest with how I feel, as I usually like to say that I'm fine even though I'm not. It's hard for me to admit that I'm not feeling well because I do not like the attention it brings! I pray that

you get some clear answers from your doctors very soon. Are there any hobbies you can do to pass the time spent inside the house? I love to sew but have not been up to doing that. I recently received some hand embroidery kits that I may try. Wishing you some improved health and some firm answers! Mary Ellen Costa

Royce Brooks

March 30, 2011, 12:00 AM

Thanks for "telling it like it is". It really is OK to admit that you are tired and weary-- who wouldn't be from a journey like yours! Yet you always manage to glorify the Father,

even thru the valleys. Your poem is a treasure, just like you! We love you so much!! You're always in our prayers, Royce, Gary and Mark

Danae Hischke

March 30, 2011, 12:01 AM

Lee, I am so sorry to hear about the rough days you are having - of course you and Steve are in my prayers. I absolutely love your journal entry!! And I can relate... Take care, my friend. Love, Danae cp:allaboutjordan

Stephanie Patchin

March 30, 2011, 12:01 AM

Your poem is just one example of the beauty God has blessed you with. I love you Lee and am praying for you.

Sandy Cooper

March 30, 2011, 12:40 AM

Lee you and Steve are in our daily prayers. We pray for you both. May your days become brighter and your nights not so long. Love Uncle Sandy & Jay (We will say extra prayers that you see the sunlight of good health to come)

Krista Maggard

March 30, 2011, 1:54 AM

Thank you for sharing your heart, Lee! You are in my thoughts and prayers daily. I pray for guidance & wisdom in your doctor's studies, strength through your solitude, and as always, God's loving hands to reach down to you and Steve with comfort and support, holding you tight as you travel down this new road. You guys are so very blessed to have the Love of the Lord in your life to help guide you on this journey! No doubt you are becoming just who He wants you to be. Many hugs your way, Krista Maggard

Steve Braden

March 30, 2011, 2:25 AM

I pray that you get stronger as you make me stronger each time I read your update. Uncle Steve and I love you both very much. Aunt Helen

Sandi Henry

March 30, 2011, 4:12 AM

Will you email your home address to sandi1957@gmail.com? Thanks!

Dan Faust

March 30, 2011, 7:27 AM

Come weary saints tho tired and weak Hide away in the love of Jesus Your strength will return by His quiet streams Hide away in the love of Jesus Hear Him calling your name See the depths of His love in the wounds of His grace... How reassuring it is to know the depths of His love... Seen in the wounds of His grace as He gave His very self for us... What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? (Rom 8:31-32) All the promises of God find their "yes" in Jesus. In Him there is only hope, and it will not disappoint. I pray He gives you grace to rejoice in that hope, Dan Faust

james fletcher

March 30, 2011, 3:00 PM

Beautiful! You and Steve are loved much. Nina Ervin Fletcher

Bethany Mincey

March 30, 2011, 4:06 PM

Lee, I am certain that God's hand is on you because there is no way anyone could endure this battle as well as you have without His mighty power and strength. Your faith is so encouraging to me. Thank you for sharing your heart because it helps me know exactly what to pray for. Love, Bethany Bill & Bev Matney March 30, 2011, 4:43 PM Stay strong in the Lord. I know he answers prayers and helps us to heal. I am finally feeling lke my life is beginning again as i can once again walk and feel good. I went from bed ridden to enjoying life again so PLEASE DO NOT GIVE UP. Continue praying and trusting in him. He will heal, not the doctors....they don't call it "medical practice" for nothing...LOL Bev Matney

Erika Cushman

March 30, 2011, 5:46 PM

I love you Lee and I am praying! I love that Jesus continues to use you to minister to others even when you cannot leave your home :) Thank you for remaining faithful it's been a blessing to witness. Erika

Cherie Leyva

March 30, 2011, 5:49 PM

Lee, Your journal is beautiful just like you are. I continue to be in awh with your strength and words of faith. We will all pray and "be still with you." Please stay strong the answer has got to be near. In God we will have faith. We love you Lee, Cherie

Joan Bouck

March 30, 2011, 6:49 PM

Oh, my dear girl, Lee, you continue to be an inspiration of grace in spirit and I applaud your perserverence and ability to keep going through what you have to go through to get well. You know if there's anything you need or want, please let us know. We're here for you and Steve. Joan, FD3

janice pierce

March 30, 2011, 7:33 PM

Was lifting you up this morning in my prayer time and I appreciate the update. Will continue to keep you and Steve in my prayers. Love to you both, Janice Pierce

D Ward

March 30, 2011, 8:48 PM

Thank you for sharing your gift of faith and the beautiful poem. You continue to be in our prayers!!! Your gift of sharing strengthens me as I'm in the house with a case of shingles. You are a blessing!!! Love, Debby and family

Betsy Ramsey

March 30, 2011, 9:49 PM

lee, you minister to each of us every time you post something.

Thank you! Betsy Ramsey

Jeanne Blanton

March 31, 2011, 12:09 AM

Lee, I knew you were special from the moment I met you! Your love for God glows from you and I saw the heart of Jesus in you instantly! I will continue to lift you up in Prayer and am so blessed to read your words. I loved your journal

entry..."Be Still...." May God hold you close and give you rest

while you spend time in His presence being still. God is using you to touch each one of us in a unique way as you have so touched my heart from the moment I met you. I love you dear sister in Christ and pray with you, "Jesus, what do you want me to become?" May His will be done in and through our lives....

Jill Shelton

March 31, 2011, 2:16 AM

Lee, what a precious inspiration you are and have always been to me, you and Steve both. I miss you guys so much and oh how I wish I could see you, catch up and reminesce on the days of our old youth mission trips and fun at church. But how you never seem to amaze me that you always find good in everything. I know it is sometimes tough. I have recently found out some things too about my health. I'm just trying to stay positive and take things one day at a time as I am counting down the days until I finish nursing school. But I do think God has his reasons and after all this school, maybe it's time for me to be still too. But oh how that is so very hard for me. But I pray that through your strength and example, we will conquer and get through all things together, my sister in Christ. I love you guys & pray for you a lot.

Hang in there my friend.

Stephanie Anderson

March 31, 2011, 3:25 AM

Lee, thank you for your encouraging message on my page. I'm so glad you let me know you've read my page. Your writing ministered to me tonight. I think it's so important to know we are not alone in this difficult thing called life, both that the Lord is with us as well as fellow travelers.

Praying you will sense the Lord's presence in a special way.

- Stephanie

Tim Hatmaker

March 31, 2011, 11:24 AM

You continue to be in our thoughts and prayers. Tim Hatmaker and the Hatmaker family.

Anna Lee Drewry

March 31, 2011, 7:06 PM

I pray that you see renewed strength through all of us as we continue to pray for complete healing. My thoughts and prayers are with you daily.

Dan Sharp

April 1, 2011, 1:52 AM

Lee, It was great being able to joke and laugh with you the other day. It's a true testiment to your character that you can lift others' spirits while struggling yourself physically and emotionally. I admire your strength and continuous giving or yourself for the glory of God and benefit of others. Dan

sue ensign

April 1, 2011, 4:51 PM

What true beauty comes from your soul, Jesus shines brightly through you! Thank you for sharing. Praying for healing as always, Susan<><

Mary Ellen Costa

April 2, 2011, 11:50 PM

Hi Lee: Just checking in, as I was thinking about you. Hope today is a good day! Fondly, Mary Ellen Costa

Linda Hamilton

April 6, 2011, 5:40 PM

Thanks so much for the update, Lee, and for your beautiful poem. Your time of waiting is definately not wasted....you, and Steve too, are teaching us all so many things about God, suffering, patience, committment, God's grace and His provision. Laughter is truly good medicine,

and that's one of the first things I noticed about you when I first met you - you have an incredibly adorable sense of humor! And you both are blessing us all. We be prayin'!!!

Doris Hixon

May 18, 2011, 11:12 PM

Hi Lee, Just reading You're care page and i'm so thankful you are doing better. Of course you're mom fills us in at church. Lee I will continue to pray for you and Steve each day, You're just special to me, I think of you often and so glad I am able to connect with you. Always know I care and Love You Very Much! Doris Hixon